Post Script: Etiquette Expert Diane Gottsman

With a degree in sociology under her belt, Diane Gottsman knew teaching etiquette was a logical career path. She started out teaching abused and neglected children the art as a way to empower them, then moved on to helping the professional sector. As if to emphasize her love for the cause, she now boasts her own line of stationery (welcome to the club!). Here, the purveyor of all things proper talks stamp love, Amelia Earhart and the etiquette rule she’ll never break.

etiquette expert diane gottsman

How long have you been teaching etiquette and how did you end up doing so?
I’ve been teaching etiquette for 15 years, starting with children in the beginning and later evolving into the corporate and university arena. I was shocked at the number of successful professionals that I interacted with daily that were truly gifted in business but lacked social skills.
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Post Script: The Gracious Girl

Mindy Lockard, aka The Gracious Girl, can’t remember a time when she wasn’t interested in etiquette. The former finishing school graduate began spreading the gracious gospel professionally nine years ago, pontificating on everything from dinner party manners to interview poise. Here, she speaks to us about her college pen pal, e-mail formality and why she’s always touchy-feely with her paper.

mindy lockard the gracious girl
How did you end up teaching etiquette?
It was just after I had my first daughter, Elle. A friend — who knew I had gone to finishing school as a child — asked if I would teach her daughter. At first I declined, but then after I thought about the life lessons I wanted to give my own child — confidence and kindness — I knew that spreading the word about manners was exactly where I wanted to focus my attention.
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In Celebration Of: The At-home Card

at home card personalized wedding stationeryThere was a time when the honeymoon was a grand adventure that often involved steamer trunks, dressing for the dining car and plenty of newly acquired couples’ stationery to keep in touch with friends and family from afar.

We like to think the latter accouterment is still in favor, even though the honeymoon has become a less extravagant post-wedding affair for most newlyweds. Whether a couple indulges in a two-week African safari or a weekend getaway to the Vineyard, there is one piece of wedding stationery we still find quite charming: the at-home card.

Traditionally, a couple would send at-home cards before leaving on a honeymoon that would keep them away oftentimes for a month, sometimes longer. Even though honeymoons are shorter today, an at-home card is still a lovely way to make family and friends aware of your new address.

Included with the wedding invitation or marriage announcements, at-home cards are small enclosure cards that match the card stock, lettering style and ink color of your invitations. They alert people of the address at which you will be residing and the date after which you will be there (most couples use the date on which they return from their honeymoon). Many couples now include their phone numbers and email addresses on their at-home cards.

The wording for at-home cards sent with announcements is different from the wording for at-home cards sent with the invitations. At-home cards sent with announcements show your names together as “Mr. and Mrs.” Since you are already married when they are sent. When sent with invitations, your names are not used since you are not yet married and cannot use “Mr. and Mrs.”

While the principal purpose of at-home cards is to let people know your new address, when sent with announcements they can also let people know that you have chosen to continue to use your maiden name. Your name appears on the first line, followed your husband’s name on line two. The remainder of the card reads as it normally would. Since you could have presented yourself as “Mrs.” bud did not, it will be assumed that you are still using your maiden name.

At-home cards are not gift-request cards and should never be interpreted as such.

Instead, think of at-home cards like the change-of-address cards you might send when you move. They simply announce your new address and are a great convenience for anyone who wants to keep in touch with you — which will certainly give you a chance to use that new personalized stationery.

Have a question about correspondence etiquette? Email our Crane Concierge at concierge@crane.com. 

From the Archives: Vintage Crane & Co. Advertisements

Being around for more than 200 years will build quite an archive. It’s an absolute delight to sift through old engraving dies, ledgers and, our favorite, advertisements. We had advertisements geared toward the “Business Man,” the “Presidents of Savings Banks” and, of course, brides. Ones highlighting the fact that our paper is made from cotton rags. Ones highlighting how great it is to use with a typewriter. And ones about what using Crane says about you (hint: really good things).

Below are some of our favorites…

1. For your paper trousseau: This ad from the 50′s spoke to the classic bride, suggesting the kinds of papers she should use for her wedding and beyond. “Assures correctness… confers distinction” is the tagline, assuring her that choosing Crane is both proper and special.

vintage wedding stationery advertisement
2. Wedding gifts by telephone: This print ad from 1924 plays to the aspirational woman and her desire to make the most proper impression. No well-bred girl would do such a thing, the ad suggests of acknowledging wedding gifts by telephone. She also wouldn’t type her wedding invitations, send a “dowdy letter of acceptance” for a party or write a letter on “the only paper you could find,” and instead lives by this ad’s tagline: “Style is a greater social asset than beauty.”


3. What does the letter say, Jean? The dialog in this ad — printed in The Ladies’ Home Journal in 1921 — is between two girlfriends or sisters, discussing a letter the one has just received. When asked what the letter said, the recipient’s response is that the letter says the writer has “good taste” and “a fine appreciation of what is correct.” Of course, the punchline is that the recipient is referring to what the paper (Crane, of course) says about the sender, ending with this mantra: “Writing paper tells much more than many people think.”


4. Stationery should reflect station: We love the angle this 1926 ad takes when appealing to the “Business Man.” The copy sets the scene, a meeting between the Business Man and his lithographer. The latter suggests Crane, suggesting that one’s stationery should reflect one’s station in life. The former balks at paying more for his letterhead. The lithographer’s pitch: A company should take its paper “out of the classification of office expense and put it in the advertising and selling budget.”

business stationery letterhead advertisement
5. To the Presidents of Savings Banks: This ad from 1936 is one of our favorites because of how well it represents a time very much in the past — a time when relationship between banker and bank account customer was more than just the Customer Service contact on a website. The ad suggests using Crane to send letters of welcome to “new depositors” as well as to keep in touch with old customers, as “no other paper lends so much dignity and distinction to correspondence.”

banking stationery advertisementCare to see more of our vintage advertisements? They’re all available to peruse on our Pinterest board!

Wedding Etiquette: At-Home Cards

at home card personalized wedding stationeryThe original purpose of the at-home card was to let guests know when the newlyweds will be back from their honeymoon (often a grand tour of Europe) and at which address they will be residing.

Couples still use them for such a purpose, but they are also used today to communicate new contact numbers and email addresses. It is also a lovely way to present a bride’s new name.
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How to Leave Your Calling Card

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Calling cards were originally made for the nobility to hand to a footman when paying a call or to leave at the home when the person called upon was absent. When making a social call, you left a calling card for each adult on whom you were calling. Never, however, exceeding three cards.

Though the calling card is now primarily used in lieu of a business card at social occasions or for the social mother to plan play dates, we quite like the idea of adhering to the conventions of calling card etiquette. Below is a collection of actions, taken from The Complete Engraver, one may apply to this classic form of correspondence when making a social call.

Have more questions about etiquette? Email our Crane Concierge at conciege@crane.com.

How to Make the Crane & Co.cktail

Because we like to think the perfect evening letter is always accompanied by the perfect libation — and because everyone should be privy to a signature cocktail — we present to you the Crane & Co.cktail, courtesy of our favorite purveyor of all things fancy, Mrs. Lilien. Enjoy!

mrs. lilien crane & co. cocktail

Recipe:

2 oz Gin

Juice + zest of 1 lime

3 oz fresh grapefruit juice

2tbs agavae nectar

champagne float

In a shaker half filled with ice add the gin, lime zest + juice, grapefruit juice + agavae nectar. SHAKE. Pour into prepared highball and top with a champagne float.

For more delectable recipes, pick up a copy of Mrs. Lilien’s new book, “Mrs. Lilien’s Cocktail Swatchbook.” Cheers!

 

Etiquette: How to Use QR Codes on Your Stationery

letterpress bar mitzvah invitation with qr codeRecently at the 2012 National Stationery Show, we dedicated one of our storefront windows (prime real estate!) to QR Codes and how to incorporate them into social stationery. Wedding invitations, letterhead, business cards: Why yes, there is a way to include one and still keep that classic aesthetic & craftsmanship Crane & Co. is known for.

In case you’re curious how to do so, we’ve put together this handy QR Code Etiquette Guide. Technology never looked so luxurious.

Have more questions about stationery etiquette & style? Email our Crane Concierge at concierge@crane.com. 

Etiquette: How to Write a Post-Interview Email & Thank You Note

Navy Blue Thank You Note with Fashion LinerThey liked your resume enough to call you in for an interview: Congratulations! We’re sure you nailed it, but your work isn’t quite done yet. Now, it’s time to follow up.

The Follow-up Email

Follow-up email(s) should be sent the same day to your interviewer and anyone else who was involved in the process (we hope you took everyone’s business card while you were there), from the secretary who scheduled the interview and brought you a glass of water to prospective co-workers who may have popped in to ask a few questions.

  1. This email should be brief: One sentence thanking so-and-so for taking the time out of his/her day to meet with you. Include a detail or two that refreshes his/her memory about the conversation (chances are they had several applicants walk through the doors that day) — a shared alma mater or a shared affinity for U2, for example.  Continue reading